Wednesday, April 13, 2011

Why the Friendly Fire?


Have you ever tried to help someone who was so intent on gaining something that they attacked you in the process. You probably went down yelling, "Hey! What are you doing? I'm on your side!"

I think back to the swimming class I took in college. I was desperately trying to overcome my fear of the water, so I showed up with resolved enthusiasm the day we were to tackle swimming unassisted by holding on to the edge of the pool. (I can hear you avid swimmers out there snickering at me right now!) I calmly lowered myself into the water as my teacher, who was already in the pool, reassured me that she would remain nearby while I practiced the strokes. But it wasn't long before I dipped too low and too long under the water and began to panic. The teacher moved toward me as fast as she could, trying to calm me and stop me from flailing and thrashing all over the place. But the moment she got close enough to help me regain composure, I grabbed her around the neck so hard that I pulled her under with me. Thank God she was a trained professional. I could have killed us both! I didn't realize it at the time, but all she was trying to do was get me back into the right position so I could stop fighting the water and breathe.

That's what friendly fire looks like. By definition, it is to inadvertently fire upon your ally while attempting to engage enemy forces (in my case, the water), resulting in injury and sometimes death. If you know what it feels like to be fired upon, you definitely don't want to be the one holding the gun, do you?

Be honest. Have you been a little too defensive, insensitive, sarcastic, overbearing, or impatient with people whose only aim is to help you out? Have you alienated some of them in your attempt to take the world by storm? If so, you might want to step back and assess where all this unwarranted hostility is coming from. I guarantee you there's probably some unresolved fear at the root of it all. My charge to you is to call a ceasefire. You don't want to risk losing the very ones who were sent to help you win the battle.