Turn Down, For What?

Remember the Los Angeles riots that broke out back in the '90s? In the midst of all that chaos and racial unrest, the most unlikely cry came from the most unlikely man, and it's still being used today. "Can't we all just get along?" Rodney King said this, ironically enough, after the outrage over the video which captured his brutal assault at the hands of some overzealous LAPD officers gave way to violence in the streets. You would think he would have been the last person to utter such a request. I find myself answering, "Yeah, we could Rodney, if we would just stop trying to control one another."

Recently, a coaching client of mine told me that all her life she had been afraid to be her true self: creative, spontaneous, energetic, even silly when she felt like it. She was told to tone down because she was just "too much" for people to take sometimes. It made her shrink into a mold that almost became a casket, and it was all to try to keep the peace with people who, for whatever reason, couldn't handle her authenticity. Now that she's taken her true identity back and has come out of her shell, she is experiencing life on a whole new level. But she expressed some guilt about that because it has caused someone that she had been close with to be at odds with her. Unfortunately, this is not uncommon.

Be honest. Do you find yourself going along to get along sometimes? You know. Not wanting to rock the boat or upset the apple cart? I've done it and it's about as comfortable as wearing pantyhose that are two sizes too small.

When you get a revelation of who you really are and what you've really got, don't be surprised if others get a little puffy in the cheeks about it. The truth is they would be like that anyway, no matter what you do. Misery loves company for a reason. Don't allow their negativity and/or jealousy to cause you to shrink back and lose the ground you've already gained. You are not in charge of making them happy. That's their job.

God has blessed you with a purpose for living. Go after it and live on full blast. Those who get that will get you. So if you must part ways with someone because of this, it's not your fault or your problem. As my beloved Big Mama used to say, "Feed 'em with a long-handled spoon" and move forward.

Life is too good and too short for you to turn down. For what?