Making Yourself Matter

I did it again... for the umpteenth time. My husband suggested I go shopping for some new clothes but once again, I wormed my way out of going. Then when it was time to pick something out to wear for a recent event, there I was, standing frustrated inside my closet. Crazy, right? I know. This is my secret vicious cycle. 

Why do I do this? Well, that's the million-dollar question. I had to dig deep to find the answer, and believe me, what I found wasn't pretty. However, I hope that by exposing my inner cobwebs, I'll somehow encourage and inspire you to face and do away with your own.

I prayed for some divine insight on this, since I couldn't quite put my finger on my motivation for giving myself such sub-par treatment. Here's what eventually emerged:

• I hate to shop for myself
• Why? Because I don't like the hassle
• Why? Because my issues with fluctuating weight give me angst whenever I try on new clothes
• Due to this angst, I tend to subconsciously avoid shopping unless it's absolutely necessary
• By doing what? Finding an excuse to do ANYTHING else that doesn't require so much time and effort (like take a nap!)
• Message I send to myself: "You don't look right, so why go shopping? You don't matter enough to put time into looking good."
• End result: missed opportunities, limited wardrobe options, frequent frustration, and a bewildered hubby 

See how I had to spiral it all out in order to find the real obstacle? You may have to do the same thing if you ever want to get out of your own self-defeating habit (if you have one). To turn things around, I  put my coaching skills to work on myself. 

Life is an unknown span of time. How you spend that time matters. Therefore, giving yourself a generous helping of that time translates to you, and to those around you, that YOU matter. What you need to feel strong, beautiful, loved, confident - it deserves your attention. Forget about waiting until you like it. Just do it!

This really hit home with me especially when I began to consider the unspoken messages I've probably been sending to my two teenage daughters. As the alpha female in their lives, they will assuredly take their cues from me, so I had better be about the business of modeling proper self-care.

So here's the resolution I made toward MAKING MYSELF MATTER. I asked my husband to hold me accountable for budgeting time and money each month to take care of my own personal needs (wardrobe shopping, eyebrow waxing, mani/pedi, etc.). He goes out of his way to accommodate me in whatever way he can, so I'd better take advantage of all this lovely generosity. As an added measure of accountability, I've decided to post some upcoming pics of my personal care excursions. After all, I can't talk it if I'm not willing to walk it, right?

Now it's your turn. Comment below and tell me what you do (or will do) to MAKE YOURSELF MATTER.

Until next time, keep your head up!